There is a well-known story of a professor who stood in front of his class with an empty jar, and sand, pebbles and big rocks. How could he fit it all into the jar? 

When he tried to put in the sand and pebbles first, the big rocks wouldn’t fit. The big rocks—your major commitments and priorities—come first, and then you can fit in the smaller obligations (the sand and pebbles).

Family comes before friends, friends come before community, making a living comes before volunteering. For example, your child’s school recital takes precedence over an acquaintance’s wedding, and preparing properly for Shabbat comes before having guests. 

See which people and activities are really not that important to you, and let some go. By sacrificing the minor relationships, you’ll be able to invest more in the major ones.

Above all, you need to take care of yourself before you can take care of the world. As Hillel said, “If I am not for myself, who is for me?” Or as flight attendants put it, you need to put your oxygen mask on first before helping anyone else with his. 

This means eating right, getting enough sleep, exercising, and yes, enjoying yourself and doing things you like to do. 

Of course, there’ll be exceptions (when you have a newborn, you can’t expect eight hours of sleep . . .), but in general, you can’t fill anyone else up if you’re not full yourself. Spend your time on activities and with people who energize you, not drain you of energy.


https://www.chabad.org/theJewishWoman/article_cdo/aid/3190778/jewish/For-the-Person-with-Too-Many-Social-Commitments.htm